Life Goes on.............

And on.. And on.. And on.. somewhere.
Still plugging at it.. still working at it.. still looking, hoping and trying to make things work.
What a difficult life it is starting from scratch alone.
Still of the mind set that I never felt I took anything for granted as far as the many gifts of my life..
Good, Bad or Otherwise.
But dammit..
How did I never 'see' how hard this would be?
Not that I had a choice.. not that I had a say so really.
I mean sure.. there were tough times.. rough patches and worrisome bouts.
But this.. This sense of alone and stranded and abandondment can be quite over whelming at times.
Making one wonder how we go on.
How we will ever, I mean EVER make it out alive!
Surely scathed!
The polar opposite of course of 'unscathed'!
Not to be confused of course with damaged goods mind you.. just damaged.

I'd like to say each day gets a bit easier.
It doesnt really, but maybe a little less painful.
Maybe a little less devastation..
Tears still flow, just able to keep them a bit more in check.
Not quite so mind of their own-ish.

Still.. plenty of worry, fear, wonder and what ifs going on..

But!

I do realize for the first time tonight I just may be ready to make some jokes about it all.
Not whats happened really.. not about him or us or the loss of a life..
But the aftermath..
Mulling it around a bit tonight.
Thinking my next installment or 2 might just so happen to be a bit if for lack of better words..
Strangely humorous.....

Thoughts are roaming....

TBC..